Summer is right around the corner. It’s an exciting time of year. Warmer weather, travel, breaks from school and work. More time outdoors and family gatherings. While many people look forward to this more relaxed time of year, summer can be stressful at times. As a parent, it can be challenging to navigate schedule changes and the changes it can bring out in kids. Emotional regulation is one area kids can regress in during the summer. Today we’re going to talk about emotional regression, why it happens, and what you can do to help keep the summer running as smoothly as possible.
What Is Emotional Regression?
Emotional regression happens when your child develops emotional regulation skills but then they appear to revert back to an earlier stage when they didn’t have those skills. Some kids regress by not using their regulation skills appropriately.
Although it might be confusing or frustrating, regressions in all areas are completely normal. Most of the time they are temporary. If your child is going through an emotional regression it might mean your child is having difficulty:
- Identifying their emotions
- Problem-solving appropriately
- Communicating how they feel
- Using their coping skills
Some obvious signs of emotional regression in kids can be:
- Tantrums
- Outbursts
- Yelling
- Defiance
- Fighting
- Mood swings
- Being withdrawn or anxious
You know your child best. You know where they are in their development and if there has been a change. You might notice these a lot more during the summer. They happen for many different reasons.
Causes Of Emotional Regulation Regression During The Summer
There are many different reasons your child could regress during the summer but the most common reasons are because of a change in routine, increased screen time, and changes in their socialization.
Disruption In Routine
Kids are so excited to have a long summer break but routine is really important to everyone – especially kids. Even if you have a summer routine, it just isn’t the same. They feel the difference. Your schedule will largely depend on your lifestyle but a loose schedule or routine is better than no routine.
Many routines and schedules change because of traveling, visiting with family, and enjoying the outdoors. It’s easy for bedtimes to be extended and for kids to eat differently at family gatherings, picnics, and barbeques. This can all affect their mood and behavior, which trickles down to how they regulate their emotions.
Being aware of this is important. You may want to make changes to help your child adjust. Just simply being aware that this can affect them is important because it helps you be more patient with them.
Increased Screen Time
In today’s world, it’s extremely hard to get away from screen time. Screen time isn’t just for TV and video games anymore. Even reading and academic learning programs are all on the computer. When kids are at home more, they’ll inevitably be on screens more than usual.
How you manage screen time is completely up to you. Some kids can be more sensitive to it than others but many parents find that increased screen time can have a negative impact on emotional regulation because kids have a difficult time stopping screen time.1 Setting limits and being consistent with those limits can help.
Screen time has been associated with disrupted sleep because the light on the phone sends a message to your brain to decrease melatonin, a naturally occurring hormone that helps with sleep regulation. If sleep is disrupted, emotional regulation will be too. If you think screen time is interfering with your child’s sleep consider stopping all screen use two hours before bedtime.2 Establishing a nighttime routine and good sleep hygiene habits can help your kids learn these healthy habits early.
Change In Socialization
Socialization changes during the summer. If your kids attend school all year, they’re used to seeing the same people at the same time. Some kids might have reduced social interactions if they’re spending more time with family or traveling. For many kids, their interactions with adults increase while their socialization with kids decreases.
Some kids might go to camps and while they are socializing with other kids, it’s different. Helping your kids stay connected to some of their best school friends can help during the long summer break where they might feel more isolated from their peers.
What You Can Do
If your child is experiencing regression in emotional regulation this summer, there are things you can do to help.
Go back to basics
If your child is regressing with their emotional regulation skills, going back to the basics is important. Help your kids identify their emotions. For younger kids, reading books on emotions and how to express them can be really helpful. For older kids, having conversations about emotions can be helpful. Or a journal might help them if they’re reluctant to talk about emotions.
If they have difficulty identifying their emotions or communicating, you can help them by asking them open-ended questions and telling them what you’re observing.
Here are some examples:
“I notice that you’ve been more quiet and spending a lot of time in your room. Can you tell me a little bit more about how you’re feeling?”
“I noticed you’ve been more irritable lately. Is there anything bothering you?”
After they learn to identify and communicate their emotions, you can talk to them about what their emotions are trying to tell them.
Talk to your kids about what their emotions are telling them
Teaching kids that emotions can be clues to what is going on within them can help them understand their emotions and learn to work with them.
Karla McLaren does a lot of work in this area and has developed an emotional vocabulary list for people.
According to her work, the emotion of anger can help you set boundaries with people and protect your sense of self. Also, worry and anxiety might mean you’re anticipating change or it might mean you need to be on alert or attentive to a certain area of your life.
For more information on increasing your emotional vocabulary and learning what emotions might be trying to tell you, check out Karla’s free emotional vocabulary list here.
Once your child learns what their emotions are trying to tell them, they can understand them better.
How Neurofeedback Can Help
Neurofeedback is a type of brain training that can help kids feel more calm, confident, and relaxed. It promotes an overall healthy lifestyle. Whole Family Neurofeedback promotes NeurOptimal® neurofeedback because it’s easy to do and you can do it in the comfort of your own home.
NeurOptimal® optimizes your brain for best performance and over time it helps your brain automatically shift toward this optimal functioning.
NeurOptimal® is designated by the FDA as a general wellness product to help:
- Promote healthy sleep habits and relaxation
- Bring the user back to the present moment
- Manage stress
- Keep your brain fit
- Increase focus and mental acuity
Emotional regulation skills improve when kids are feeling more calm, getting better sleep, and managing their stress. Neurofeedback can help with this. It’s just one tool you can use to help improve emotional regulation, flexibility, resilience, and neuroplasticity.
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Resources
- Is Increased Screen Time Impacting Children’s Emotional Growth?
- Sleep Foundation: How Electronics Affect Sleep
The post Your Guide To Emotional Regression:Help Your Kids Keep Their Cool This Summer appeared first on Whole Family Neurofeedback.